Today, as I was taking my daughter to school, I passed an elderly lady coming down the stairs - presumably having dropped her grandchild off. 'Oh', says she 'Nice to see somebody else here with grey hair.'. Ouch. Oh to be young again.

Back in the USA!   Just had 10 days in the UK - hence my silence.  Didn't want to tell the world that we were away and that the house was empty.  A good trip - family came for a week and then I had 3 days by myself for business. Will give more details latere.

Joey had a good day at school and is now playing nicely with Izzy and Chris.  He seems back to normal, thank goodness.

Joey had a good day at school today.  And, as we are always forgetting to comment on her, so did Isabela!

We also had our teachers conference with Mrs H.  Very positive.  Joey continues to make real progress in reading and writing.  To the point that she thinks that he could move up a class in the new year ion reading.  He still grumbles and looks for excuses not to do work but does settle down and once he has forgotten that he 'can't do' something, he just gets on with it and does very well.  behaviour much better as are social skills - but they could still do with improvement.  He says what comes into his head too often, even if it is not appropriate.  And he tends to dominate small groups of peers with his powerful personality.  We agreed that he should go back to one on one with the social behaviour teacher for a session a week for the next few months.  Said it before, but we will get there.

Also agreed with Mrs H that we can be flexible about homework.  Especially when he has an after-school activity, he gets back just in time t see other kids come out to play, or at least before he has finished his own homework.  Given the importance of encouraging social interaction with other kids, we can be a bit flexible about letting him off some homework, where appropriate.

Should add that Mrs H says that he is also doing very well in other subjects and is certainly on a level if not in advance of his peers intellectually.

Early start this morning - Joey up at 0615.  But seems better so planning on sending him to school.

But, jeez, he takes so long to eat anything!  So despite early starts, he takes ages to eat and then everything is a rush!
I am down to 198lbs!!

The wife is torturing me.  She cooked duck and chips ad then cookies for the kids.  The smell!!!  The aroma!!!  And I had a glass of beet, kale, carrots and apple.  Ugh.

Anne took Izzy to school and left me with Joey.  He has been out on the trampoline by himself for over 30 mins jumping around, practicing his boxing and kick-boxing moves.  Hopefully that will use up some energy and he will be ready to do some work when he is finished.

Kept Joey back at home today.  He is just too hyper and and with a tendency to over-react again.  We suspect that it might be that the additional supplements which are supposed to bond with toxins in the body and help excrete them might not be working properly and having a negative impact.  With the doctor's agreement, we have stopped those.

Anne worked with him at home this morning whilst I took Izzy out.  He was very good - although I am not sure that everyone would approve of using Blackjack and poker to teach maths.  But at the end he became very agitated again when he couldn't get his drawing quite right.  Rather than risk any episodes at school (he has one yesterday when he was hauled in before the deputy head at recess - accused of hitting a girl.  Seems Joey denied it and would not back down - typical stubborn Joey - claiming it was a 'misunderstanding'.  Who knows - Joey does not normally go around hitting other kids but he may have just been over-physical when upset) we will keep him home this afternoon as well.

Purge.  So, on the third day no solid food now but not feeling as bad as I thought that I would.  I have certainly lost weight - down to 198.8 lbs this morning.  Apart from when I had dengue in Brazil, I don't think that I have been that light for 30 years!

This included being at a seminar all day yesterday in Princeton.  Complete with delicious breakfast and lunch, and me with my 3 bottle of juice to last me the day.

Joey's behaviour more volatile again - very stroppy and argumentative, feels everyone is being mean to him, not showing much empathy with Izzy.  Not sure why this has happened - Anne will call the doctor this morning to see whether an additional supplement that he has started taking might have unbalanced something.  But very frustrating and aggravating for all. Hopefully a temporary blip.

Started the juice diet today.  Had a lovely 'condemned man's' dinner last night and that will be my last solid food for 5 days.  Juice is mainly mixture of kale, beets, spinach, carrot, apple etc.  Weighed 206lbs last night after dinner and 204 lbs this afternoon, after a morning helping clear trails up the Sourlands. Should be an interesting experiment.

Off to Princeton now for a seminar on tracking. Hope I don't faint.

Joey has had a good weekend, including playing with Chris.  Seems that all is forgiven.  There will be hiccups and the path will not be smooth but we are getting there.

Off to see 'Skyfall' this afternoon, with Joey.  I just love James Bond!

Good night yesterday as we celebrated Anne's birthday.  Colleague from London now in NYC came down with his wife, lovely girl originally from Angola.  Lorna and Bruce joined us.  Ate at the Bell and Whistle - very good.  Drank lots of wine and then stopped off in the Bistro for a few.  Very enjoyable.

But the backlash has started.  At Anne's prompting, I have agreed to go on a 5 day 'purge' with her, drinking only vegetable and fruit juice.  We watched 'Fat, sick and nearly nearly dead' some months ago and since then have been drinking a couple of glasses of juice per day but now we will go full on for 5 days, starting tomorrow.  I am not looking forward to it!  But should lose some weight and, hopefully, feel better.  We shall see.

Last night was not a great one for Joey.  I brought him home at about 1630 and Chris was coming up the road.  He asked Joey if he wanted to accompany him to Jacks to play and off Joey went, quite happily.

When I went to pick him up at Jack's house an hour later, he was not happy.  Didn't really say goodbye or thanks properly and then ran home upset.  Got there before me and then slammed the door as he went in, which made Anne shout at him.  He stormed upstairs crying.  Seems that the other kids were 'mean' to him and he was miserable because he had no friends and he hated this country and wanted to go back to England.

Not sure what happened.  Chris and Jack are nice kids but they have been mates for a long time and it is quite possible that they exclude Joey from tome to time.  It is also possible that they don't always want to do what Joey wants to do sometimes, or that they occasionally tease Joey and Joey still hasn't figured out a way of dealing with properly and without getting upset.  He is sensitive and his social skills need working on.

Part of the problem also is that he goes to a school where the kids have some form of learning difficulty - extending to mild autism - and this don't all have great social skills either.  And they are very spread out over a wide catchment area, so even if he got really friendly with a kid there, chances are that the kid would live miles away.

Joey has made so much progress, and is such a good kid in many ways.  very upsetting to see him upset.

Joey has balls.  Today is pizza day at school, when the school offers the kids pizzas at lunch.  Joey cannot eat it so we will send him in with a lunch.  We have also been telling him that pizza isn't really very healthy.  We said that we would speak to the Director, Deb Peters, but Joey said he would do it himself.  We advised his teacher that he wanted to do this.  Here is the correspondence with Mrs H;

 He didn’t seem to want to talk to James.  Joey  said that he wasn’t the appropriate person to speak with.  Watch out world! Wow.

From: Gery Juleff [mailto:gjuleff@hotmail.com]
Sent: Friday, November 09, 2012 9:29 AM
To: Stephanie Hoffman
Subject: RE: pizza party

Thanks. Let's hope that he has inherited a few of Gery's diplomatic skills.

 

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From: shoffmann@thecambridgeschool.org
To: gjuleff@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: pizza party
Date: Fri, 9 Nov 2012 09:09:20 -0500

Joey told me that he wanted to speak with Deb.  I told him that he could do so at snack time.  However I just found out that the Peters went to Morocco!  If James has time Joey can speak with him.

From: Gery Juleff [mailto:gjuleff@hotmail.com]
Sent: Friday, November 09, 2012 8:36 AM
To: Stephanie Hoffman
Subject: pizza party

Steffannie,

I have sent in lunch for Joey because he can't eat the pizza and he didn't want me to take him out today. He was quite upset that the school serves food that is unhealthy for all the students and inedible for those on diets like Bruce and him.  I said that I would speak to Deb Peters about the issue to see if something could be resolved that would be a treat for all. He doesn't want me to intervene, instead, wants to speak to Deb himself and argue his case. Gery and I have coached him on the importance of being polite and respectful but didn't want to discourage him from trying to correct what he sees as an injustice. I don't know how accessible Deb is during the day and if it will even be possible for Joey to speak to her but I wanted to let you know that he wants to do this.

Hopefully, the day goes well. If there are any problems we are around.

Anne

Thursday is nature club for Joey after school  Further to my post below on correspondence with his teacher re hot chocolate, I met her at the local Quick Chek on Rte 31 to pick Joey up. He was in the back of the car scoffing down organic popcorn and a shake.  Turns out it was soy milk with pumpkin and banana.  Ugh.  Tastes as bad as it sounds  but Joey loved it!

Ah, wee angels.  Butter wouldn't melt in their mouths.  They do generally play well together.  What you don't see here, of course, is Joey then getting a bit stroppy with Izzy, who then cross.  Joey shows no empathy, gets all indignant and bolshy with us and then ends up being sent to bed early.  He was very upset afterwards but he does need to learn and we have been lenient with some of his behaviour in the past.  On the plus side, he was much better the day afterwards.  A good bollocking does him good from time to time.

I have a feeling of some sort of return to 'normality' at the moment.  Joey is doing well and we do not dread getting an email or call from the school.  We have dropped looking to buy a house.  Hurricane Sandy is receding into memory, at least for us.  I have had some good news re the Bioeconomy Institute project (Shell are interested in supporting) .  Anne is more relaxed.  I am back in the gym.  We are less stressed and drinking less.  Things are looking up.

Joey's diet is a pain in the neck for him.  See correspondence with teacher below.  To think that heading down to Pizza Express in Cobham used to be a really fun treat every Friday for the kids.  Shame.

No, unfortunately I do not.  Anything with yeast, gluten or dairy products is out.  Poor kid.  Does make it difficult sometimes when Anne is fed up with cooking and in the past would have treated the kids to a pizza, which they loved!

 

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From: shoffmann@thecambridgeschool.org
To: gjuleff@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: nature club
Date: Thu, 8 Nov 2012 14:48:23 -0500

Joey is the only one in nature club, so we  will go  on a walk and then go to the health food store.  I can ask which contain milk products unless you know of a brand.

From: Gery Juleff [mailto:gjuleff@hotmail.com]
Sent: Thursday, November 08, 2012 2:46 PM
To: Stephanie Hoffman
Subject: RE: nature club

Hi Steffanie,

Only if the chocolate itself does not contain any milk products.  There are some that do but most do not.  I hope that he does not get too upset if he is unable to drink it.

Gery

 

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From: shoffmann@thecambridgeschool.org
To: gjuleff@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: nature club
Date: Thu, 8 Nov 2012 14:43:56 -0500

May Joey drink hot chocolate made with soy, rice or almond milk?

Kids awake at 0615 and came in to tell us all about it.  So downstairs to have first snowball fight in pyjamas!

Anne has just taken Izzy to the docs.  She has what seems like a bruise under her left armpit but it is very tender and there is quite a bump.  She says she got it on the trampoline so probably is just a bruise but better safe than sorry.

And it has started snowing.  Up to 6 inches expected in next 24hrs.  Feel sorry for those without power - and there are still quite a few in the hood.

Fell asleep before I heard Obama's speech.

Joey delighted with the result this morning - really cheered him up.  Good man.  He was in great form.  Hate to say it but a wee bollocking once in a while does him good.

Hurray!!!  And time for bed.

They have just said Mitt will come on in 5 mins.  Looking forward to that!

Past midnight and Obama has clearly won.  Wish Mitt would hurry up and concede defeat so we can hear Obama and go to bed!  Lovely to see the Romney crowd so quiet!

Went through the bottle, went out to Bistro to get another.  They have no wine!  All sold out!  Mixture of v busy week (think all those folks without power looking for something to do) and no deliveries.  Got a six pack.

Looking good for Obama.

2215; tight but looking good for Obama.  Decided to watch Fox News for a few minutes, just to get riled up at the bullshit therein!

Went to the liquor store to get one bottle of wine (note the 'one') to imbibe whilst we watch the election coverage.  Anne has voted - no secret that she has voted for the Democrats.  Her Mum has also stuck with Obama - only second time in her life she has voted Democrat.  Her Dad probably voted Republican, despite Anne having put on one liberal documentary or show after another all week.  Nice try!

Come on Barack!

In-laws have power and have gone home.  It has been nice having them here, especially to spend time with the kids.  They both noted how well Joey was coming on, which is nice.

But we are not 100% there and we had a bit of a face-off this evening.  Joey is not always as nice to Izzy as he should be.  When she is hurt, even when Joey has done it (eg by accident on the trampoline), and crying, he shows little or no empathy for her.  Then this evening, they were playing really nicely downstairs, both dressed up as a sheep (Joey) and a polar bear (Izzy)  and decided to put on a show.  Izzy didn't get it right, Joey became cross with her, told her she was out of the play and then got cross again when she cried.  When we pulled him up for this, he got all indignant, refused to talk about it properly and it all escalated to the point where he was sent to bed early.

I will say one thing about wee Joey, he has got balls.  He really will not back down.  If we can just channel that better, it will stand him in good stead.  I think that we will manage that.  Hopefully.

Kids back at school, in-laws back here!  Kids went back OK, bit of moaning from Joey but not too bad.  In-laws had hoped to be back in their house today but still now power so camping out here.  Hitting the gym tomorrow for first time in months.  After some 10 days without booze, had a few at the weekend.  You do feel better without the poison!

In-laws went back this morning - but are returning as they still do not have power in Ridgewood!  At least Anne and I were able to go out for dinner last night whilst they put the kids to bed!

Just heard from one of Anne's friends in Pelham - still now power and not expected back until 9 November.  And it is getting cold.

Kids back at school tomorrow.  Hurray!  I think that we are all getting a bit stir-crazy.  There is nothing really on in the area for them to do.  Fortunately the weather has been kind - no rain and generally not too cold.  They have spent a lot of time on the trampoline.  Joey has fallen out a couple of times with the neighbour, Chris.  But we think that it is at least partly because of Chris' sensitivities, not because Joey is doing anything wrong.   His parents are separated and I think that he is going through some tough times.

Sound of chainsaws has diminished, at last.  ll the fallen trees on roads have been cleared in and around the town.  West end of Hopewell still had no power this afternoon - and same applied to Pennington.  Likewise in many of the outlying districts, particularly in the Sourlands.  Lots of queues at gas stations.  Those restaurants that can open are doing very well, as is the Boro Bean.  For those without power, eating out becomes very attractive!

getting cabin fever.  We have been lucky and have power but kids off school all week, in-laws staying here and there is nowhere to go.  We are luckier than most, I know, but it is frustrating.  Fortunately the weather has been good so kids have spent reasonable amount of time outside - and thank goodness for the trampoline!  Kids are getting pretty good on it and it is great for fitness, coordination and for attracting other kids.  Best investment we ever made.

And we have eaten far too much meat over the last few days!  Dave and Anita brought all their meat down with them as they had no power - so Anne has been cooking roasts day and night.  Enough!